Tongue 'n' Cheek

 
  • A king-size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2,000 square-foot house four inches deep.
  • If you spray hairspray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
  • A three-year-old boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
 
  • The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
  • When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh," you know that it's already too late.
  • Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
  • You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
  • A six-year-old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says it can only be done in the movies.
  • Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year-old boy.
  • Playdough and microwave ovens shouldn't even be used in the same sentence.
  • If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.
  • Superglue is forever.
  • No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool, you still can't walk on water.
  • Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
  • Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
  • Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
  • Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
  • You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
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Sally Gross, Member Services Specialist
Phone: +1-480-445-9710
Email: sally@farranmedia.com
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